osama bin doppler

the calendar is telling me that it\’s the first day of spring; even so, the weather terrorists have already predicted 4-6 inches of snow for tonight and tomorrow. and, falling into their trap, i\’m already anxious about it. and i hate that.

i\’m not sure if it\’s the same in other areas, but minnesotans are very concerned about the weather. well, hold that; the local news networks *assume* minnesotans are very concerned about the weather. many mornings i find myself treadmilling with the 6 a.m. broadcasts of various local networks (c\’mon– Sportscenter\’s college basketball rundowns are not an option) and see several segments devoted to the day\’s forecast. these segments are smoothly surrounded by pieces on death and violence in the metro area, but that\’s an article for another time.

regardless, the local weather yahoos take a page from the george w. bush terror alert playbook and make every potential storm seem like– literally– the end of the world. (to be fair, the scare tactics show up in print as well.) in fact, we don\’t have storms anymore. we have \”weather events.\” predictions of slick patches, black ice, bad road conditions, and messy commutes accompany any threat of flurries, and– more often than not– the actual storm is nothing compared to what was predicted, if it happens as all. (my favorite backtrack came from paul douglas who, last month, said that his snow prediction actually came true; however, the flakes melted immediately after they left the clouds.)

why do they do this? fear attracts eyeballs. if the goof predicts 4-6 inches of snow, more people will tune into the newscasts to see if they are going to deal with shoveling the next day, working from home to stay off the roads, or go to the grocery store to load up on bread and milk. (i\’ve never understood that last one; even if it snows, it\’s not like it\’ll be days before you can leave the house again…) so, pump up the scare tactics, and you\’ll get more people watching the newscast and– more importantly– the commercials.

so i do my best to ignore them; to not take their typically incorrect predictions to heart and fret about my commute tomorrow morning. to not let the terrorists win. but i\’m guessing it won\’t work. again.







2 responses to “osama bin doppler”

  1. Mom Anderson Avatar
    Mom Anderson

    You know they do that for one reason and one reason only……..to make old MOTHERS worry about their kids and if they are going to make their commute in the morning…As you know I have laughed at your Grandma for years and years about how she always worries about the weather and guess what……..I HAVE TURNED INTO HER…it all comes with age I guess. Soooooooooo now you can take your turn and laugh at me…just remember..your time is coming…love you

  2. Explosive Bombchelle Avatar

    What makes me laugh as a wussy city girl from New York is how freaked out people get at these reports. Isn’t this Minnesota? Shouldn’t people be proud of their snow driving prowess and laughing at people from other locales who shut their cities down in a dusting? I was in training during this “storm” and the people who were in from Albany, Buffalo and Boston were laughing at the news coverage and everyone’s reaction to the snow with conversations focused on how they thought Minnesotans would be more rugged. The local weather people should be ashamed of themselves for taking away the once source of bragging rights this state just south of Canada has…

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