I Feel Old

Today is the traditional day for classes to begin at schools around the country. One of my favorite days of the year now that I am no longer attending school. Sixteen years ago (gasp!) I started my freshman year of college. I had never had an email address before arriving on campus, and I had never surfed the internet.

Freshman starting college this year not only have email and the internet, there is a whole other host of things that make them unique. I found a site today from Beloit College called the Beloit College Mindset List.

I won’t recreate the entire list, but here are a few worth calling out:

Most students entering college for the first time this fall were born in 1991.
Wow. I started driving in 1991. Ok, that alone is enough to make me feel old.

The Green Giant has always been Shrek, not the big guy picking vegetables.
Although this has more to do with Shrek, it also speaks to the fact that General Mills hasn’t used the Green Giant in many commercials lately. Might be time to dust him off.

They have never used a card catalog to find a book.
I’ll restrain myself from the old man rant. This is actually a good thing. Card catalogs were terrible to use, but were the only way to find a non-fiction book.

Salsa has always outsold ketchup.
A crime against humanity in my book.

Tattoos have always been very chic and highly visible.
Ok, time for the old man rant… back in my day tattoos were reserved for bikers and old soldiers. They looked like hell (the tattoos and those who had them), they only came in one color (faded green) and meant that you were someone who was on the outskirts of society. No one seems to know exactly why this change happened, although wikipedia says: The decoration of blues singer Janis Joplin with a wristlet and a small heart on her left breast, by the San Francisco tattoo artist Lyle Tuttle, has been called a seminal moment in the popular acceptance of tattoos as art.

They never saw the “Scud Stud”
This means they probably view the “first Iraq war” like someone of my generation views the Vietnam War.

They have never understood the meaning of R.S.V.P.
Plenty of people of all ages don’t understand that one… or choose to ignore it when place on an invitation.

Condoms have always been advertised on television
Yeah, but only on cable. Regardless, I can’t wait for the Class of 2020 when it’ll be “erectile dysfunction medication have always been advertised on television”. And how do those commercials get on network TV but condom commercials don’t? I blame a vast right-wing conspiracy.

Bobby Cox has always managed the Atlanta Braves
It’s been a long time since the Twins have been in a World Series…

There has always been a Cartoon Network.
What a frickin’ spoiled generation. Although in their defense, cartoons have been absolutely terrible for the past 18 years. Where are the Super Friends? Bugs Bunny? G.I. Joe? He-Man? Transformers? They’ve had Pokemon, Power Rangers, and Digimon.

They have never been Saved by the Bell
Ok, maybe there are some good things that they’ve missed after all.







3 responses to “I Feel Old”

  1. alex Avatar

    I can’t wait until next year’s movie references.

    They’ve NEVER been able to handle the truth!

  2. monkey Avatar

    For some reason, these struck me:
    CDs have never been sold in cardboard packaging.
    Official racial classifications in South Africa have always been outlawed.

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