Mo' Ramblin'

It's been a while since I wrote some ramblings. I know you've been counting the days. I am here, to quench your thirst.

• After about 20 minutes of watching and waiting, it became apparent that the Noggin channel is *not* what I thought it was.


No Ron Jeremy here.

• Friday afternoon was spent the way that all Friday afternoons should be spent: outside in the sun, enjoying conversation with close friends.
• Oh, and the gin & tonics were nice too.
• While recovering on Saturday, I watched "SNL: The Best of Dana Carvey" on Comedy Central. Hilarious. My favorite is his impression of Tom Brokaw, trying to record all possible story leads before vacationing for the winter. "Shocking news from Michigan... Gerald Ford dead at the senseless age of 83." Underscored my pick of Dana as the second-best cast member of all time here.
• Was that just a self-promoting plug? Huh.
• Hey, didn't you use to be Brad Radke? Not that any Twins pitcher is vying for the Cy Young award this year, but bad Brad is the supposed ace of this team. And making $8.75 million, by the way. Radke is 5-6 with a paltry 5.74 ERA. Hardly the performance of our supposed best pitcher.


He'd be great if he didn't give up so many home runs.

• Speaking of starting pitching... Radke, Rick Reed and Eric Milton's salaries compries 41% of the Twins 2003 payroll. The return on that investment is an 8-13 record, and a 5.41 ERA. Granted, Uncle Miltie is on the DL... but that's probably keeping the ERA lower.
• Protesting against the classification of an opposition group as terrorists, three Iranians set themselves on fire in Paris. Check it. I'm not sure about you, but I don't really think anything would upset me enough to do this.
• Memo to the geese on my running path: remember the last two times I ran past and didn't take your babies? I'm not going to do it this time, either. Stop the hissing. It makes me nervous.


HSSSSS right back at you. Jerk.

• A big "F" to the local radio stations, on a related note. I have five presets on my Walkman, and several times on my run ALL FIVE were running commercials. I got so excited when KS95 broke back into actual music, and then I realized it was Hootie. New Hootie. (shudder)
• I watched Jackass last night. I thought it was pretty funny, although the atmosphere probably helped a great deal. Not wanting to get all Bill Bennett up in here, but *no* kid under the age of 16 should be allowed to see that movie. Yes, it's the responsibility of parents for a) having say over what their kids are saying and b) talking to them about what they saw and how it should / should not be emulated. Overall, I think parents are doing a pretty crappy job at that, though.


Where's the midget?

• Seriously, though... the part where the Jackass guys get made up by old men and then have wars out in public on their old-person scooters... Great stuff.
• Public service announcement: if you have a box of Hamburger Helper and it says "best if used before November, 2000," take its word for it.
• Not that I'm saying it... but at some point someone should ask about the success of the latest Iraq war if a) no weapons of mass distruction are found and b) Saddam Hussein is still alive.


"If you question the President, you're letting the terrorists win."

• Is that John Ashcroft looking in my window? I can't see him with all the layers of plastic tarp that I've stapled over it.
• Another sign of me growing up... I'm now not so upset about Oprah selecting "East of Eden" as the latest selection in her book club. At first I was upset, like when 100 people showed up to see the Peacemakers play at the 400 Bar a couple of years ago. Steinbeck and Roger Clyne were supposed to be my little secrets!!! But that's just my inner only child talking. Having more people read "East of Eden" is a good thing-- now I can tell even more people that their interpretation is wrong. :)
• I just finished Steinbeck's "Winter of Our Discontent." If you feel like trying Steinbeck but find Eden's size a little off-putting, I reccomend Discontent. It shows off Steinbeck's greatest asset, the visual prose that completely takes you from where you are to where he is. However, Discontent is much less of an epic-- you can get through it pretty quickly.
• Spike Lee may have the biggest ego in the history of mankind. To assume that TNN renaming itself to Spike TV because of him is asinine at best. You know, every time I think about NASCAR or Dukes of Hazzard reruns or animated series featuring the voice of Pamela Lee, I immediately think of Spike Lee. With his latest string of turkeys, you'd think Spike would appreciate the pub.


I'll probably be sued for using this image.

• Sara and I thought about buying the latest Harry Potter on Saturday. That is, until we saw the price. $30? Seriously? I'm generally a free-market guy, but that seems to be a bit asinine. Apparently they could've charged more, as "The Order of the Phoenix" sold 5 million copies on its first day of being released.
• Adam Sandler got married? What kind of woman would want to subject herself to such torture?


"I got married... Woopity doo..."

• We have seven people in our deadpool, with ten picks each. Accounting for some overlap, we are approximately 0/65 with half of the year over with. Next year we should take bids from aging celebrities, apparently anyone we picked is blessed with eternal life. My fear: Matthew Perry and Whitney Houston get in a gunfight at a treatment center and Chelle wins by a landslide.
• Congratulations to the New Jersey Nets for winning the 2003 NBA Championship. Or was it the Mavericks? Oh, that's right. I don't care. My NBA attention span burns out around November, and they have approximately eleven months of the season left after that.


I think it's great that Chris Weber won a ring this year. Wait...

• Speaking of the NBA, I sure am excited about the draft this week. Nothing greater than an 18-year-old who couldn't get the "Name" question right on the SAT complaining about disrespect while signing a four-year, $25 million contract. Playing high-schoolers improves the quality of games, right?

That's all folks. Have a good week. Think puppies.