The Cost of Life

Wanna watch the NCAA college basketball tournament (aka March Madness) online (presumably at work) this year? It’ll cost you. If you’re a cable or dish subscriber, you can ‘authenticate’1 with your account and watch all the games for ‘free’. If you’re not one of those people, you can pay $3.99 for the whole slate of games.

“We had to protect our distributors, and part of that protection is to make sure when people are cable, satellite or Telco subscribers, they have the opportunity to watch all these games for free on any device they want,” [Turner Sports president David] Levy told

Translation: “Why aren’t you witless sheep spending $100/month to buy cable and watch all of our quality programming? Then this would be ‘free’ for you.”

I will allow that four bucks is a reasonable price point. However, this does nothing to lessen my view that the cable companies are doing EVERYTHING they can to protect their cartel model for television against those of us who would prefer not to pay a maximum amount of money to watch the minimal amount of what we’d like to see on television.

  1. We’ll see how well that works.

Best Comedy on Television:

This category is so far out of my wheelhouse that I considered just nominating Mama’s Family and ceding the floor. However, I do have a serious nomination: The Simpsons. Granted, I haven’t watched a new episode in at least five years, but Homer Simpson deserves to be in the conversation for ‘funniest character ever’, and I’ll put seasons 3 through 10 up against all comers. And it’s still on the air, so it fits the criteria. Now I’ll cede the floor to two people who actually watch television.

Continue reading “Best Comedy on Television:”

Classic Minnesota

I’d like to paraphrase the 15-second promo for one of our news stations that I heard the other night. I feel that it captures the essence of how ridiculous Minnesota can get sometimes. (Picture these bullet points appearing on screen along with the perky anchorwoman.)

“Here are some of the stories we’re working on for [redacted] News tonight:

The woman who swerved and killed an 11 year old boy was drunk!

A man is accused of sexually molesting children in his mother’s own daycare!

And there’s a chance of rain all week!

Tune in at [redacted]!”

The Best and Worst of Saturday Night Live

The Best and Worst of Saturday Night Live – 2010 Edition —————————————- Live from New York…it’s Saturday Night!!! Seven years ago I wrote a long article about Saturday Night Live. Since that time it has becoming the most viewed page on Since seven years have passed I’ve decided to update the article, much like the second edition of a book. For the most part it’s the same, but still new and improved! Enjoy. Continue reading “The Best and Worst of Saturday Night Live”

Just Throw Me The Damn Swatches

I am currently enjoying a lazy Saturday morning watching some mindless television when I wander past A&E and the on screen display says: “Keyshawn”.

Um… what? On A&E? So I hit the info button and I get: “Keyshawn Johnson: Tackling Design“.

What is even more frightening is that he seems to actually know what he’s talking about. Although he’s still an asshole.

Check out a snippet, or watch entire shows here.