Meet the new boss…

purple pride, purple pride, purple pride.  if you believe what the east-side fish-wrap factory says, KoRo got picked up in mankato last night on suspicion of drunken driving.  drunken driving may actually be a leap; he was charged with driving under the influence, and this morning KFAN’s mike morris said that certain painkillers can make football players loopy enough to seem like they have been drinking heavily.  however, given the time of day that robinson was arrested, his well-documented history of abuse, it seems prudent to connect those dots. 

if true, i feel very bad for him.  he obviously has some demons that he hasn’t conquered yet, and he needs to do whatever possible to get healed.  and for the vikings…  this should no longer be a surprise, right?  you didn’t think that losing moss and culpepper would mean that the character issues would be over, did you?  kevin williams, willie offord, and KoRo are just the latest in a long line of purple-helmeted warriors to do our state proud.  do the vikings lead the league in off-field issues over the last decade?  or am i just more exposed to their problems because they’re local? 

actually, i don’t really care.  i’m a baseball fan.  🙂

Help! Help! I’m being oppressed!

I knew it.  Grr.  Read this (and then come back). 

This totally explains why my life has been so hard.  The deck has been stacked against me since birth; something completely out of control has forced me down a certain path, (ir)regardless of my natural-born abilities.  Woe, woe is me.

But seriously, folks.  How can this be more than a statistical anomaly?  (And I fully anticipate that the other two yutzes on this site will probably argue that lefties are naturally more gifted.  Blar.)

adios, harold

in case you’ve missed it, baseball tonight has fired “analyst” harold reynolds for unnamed reasons.

i catch BT occasionally, and always found harold to be the least obnoxious of the former players providing insight.  (this is not a difficult achievement, given his competition includes the likes of john kruk and jeff brantley.)  deadspin commenters have a myriad of theories as to why harold got fired, but i’m not concerned about that as much as i am about who will replace Reynolds on the BT panel.  My votes:

  • Felix Fermin
  • Rico Brogna
  • Gregg Jefferies
  • Tripp Cromer
  • Ed Sprague

anyone else have guesses?

and i’ve already got so many throw pillows, in so many wonderful colors

random things today.  deal with it.

thanks to sparklegirl for sharing the newest david cross double-disc set.  hilarious stuff, i highly recommend it.  and it’s completely unrelated to Arrested Development, so don’t dismiss it because of my obsession with that show.

you went to my college?  really?  no…  really??

so new york islanders goalie garth snow retires…  to become the general manager of the new york islanders.  has anything like that ever happened before?  it’s sorta similar to the concept of player-manager (pete rose, bill russell), but still seems strange. 

okay, this one is stale, but i need to vent:  ESPN should be changed to WLtFECST.  (that’s “We Love to Fellate East Coast Sports Teams.”)  so on friday, june 16th, the twins had just gotten done sweeping the (then East-leading) boston red sox.  i was watching sportscenter while getting ready in the morning and the highlight package consisted of the following:

  • Ortiz RBI hit
  • Youkilis double
  • ManRam dogging it in the outfield
  • Ortiz hitting a monster foul ball
  • ManRam strikes out

granted, that last one (briefly) showed joe nathan, but that’s how they choose to spin the highlights of the game.  pricks.  although i do feel bad about the hateful shit i wished on peter gammons that day.

pam is getting married to kid rock.  i really think this is one is going to work out for her.  oh, and five coolness points to whomever can diagram this out in visio: 

This is the second time Anderson and Rock (born Robert Ritchie) have become engaged to one another.  The couple, who began dating in 2001, split up back in 2003 — one year after he’d asked for her hand in marriage; they have dated off and on ever since. Anderson had also been engaged to model Marcus Schenkenberg before their 2001 breakup. Anderson was married to Mötley Crüe drummer Tommy Lee for three years before the couple — who have two sons — divorced in 1998. They married on February 19, 1995, after knowing one another for a mere 96 hours. Anderson filed for divorce — and later reconciled with Lee — twice during the couple’s marriage.

josie’s on a vacation far away / come around and talk it over

that’s right.

the outfield.

specifically, the outfield of the minnesota baseball twins has changed dramatically over the past 72 hours.  to wit:

which leaves the team with cuddy in right, tyner in left, and a platoon of nicky p. and rondell white in center.

please stop and read that last sentence again. 

while it goes without saying, this is not a good thing for a team who is desperately chasing a wild card spot.  no one should have expected anything else from stew, who has played his last game for the twins.  but losing torii hurts, especially when his replacement is punto/white.  although, to be fair:  a) punto in center is getting gardy closer to his dream of fielding all positions with light-hitting middle infielders, and 2) rondell has hit a home run in every game since his return to the lineup from the disabled list.  tyner has looked decent, but can you really trust a former devil ray as a corner outfielder?  especially one whose career OPS is .604?

the next week or two will prove whether terry ryan and the team are willing to contend this season, or throw in the towel and trade veterans (stewart, lohse, maybe hunter?) for prospects.  souhan says that the team wouldn’t dare trade someone like hunter for prospects after having their new stadium approved.  i say that souhan must not have been following this team as long as i have.

but the aforementioned devil rays swim (float? paddle?) into town tonight for a four-game set, and there’s really no better feeling for a baseball fan than seeing that on the schedule.  hopefully we don’t lose any more outfielders, otherwise we may have to quickly find out where this guy ended up.