This doesn’t even really need a preamble, does it?

http://www.catsthatlooklikehitler.com/

I don’t typically put disclaimers on too many things. This link, however, I feel deserves one. If you don’t enjoy reading tales that are both humorous and disgusting; If you don’t appreciate stories about poop on a puerile, 4th-grade level; And c’mon now, we all know who we are, and who we aren’t; Well then I’m afraid this story is in every way not for you.

However, if you’re brave enough to soldier on, well then soldier on:

Bob the Anal Fissure

Honestly, I can’t believe that in my decade-plus of combing these here pipes that make up the internets* that I haven’t encountered this story before. Of course, it’s also possible that my powers of repression are just that good. You’ve been warned.

Shout out: I finally found this story via Audrey at LowConcept. Thanks. I think.

*(Thank you Senator Stevens.)

I have to admit, I really was blazed by this.

1. I am pretending that I am not about to lose a toenail in what looks to be, from all evidence, the next couple of days.
2. I am pretending that I will not cry like a little girl with a skinned knee when it happens.

Sure, this is cheesy; I just thought it was a funny concept…

Bonk’s Revenge